I am currently unemployed. Last Friday March 18, 2011 was my last day at my previous work place. It was incredibly devastating bidding my members and co-workers good-bye. I've been working there for two and a half years now. I was there when we first opened our doors to the public. I've seen all the different staff and members come and go. Now it's my turn to go and it just breaks my heart because that place has been like my second home for so long now.
When I first ran away to live here in this small, barren town there was nowhere for me to go and no one for me to befriend. I felt like a lost, miserable lamb. I missed my family and friends dearly although I did not want to admit it to myself. When I got fired from the first job I had found here, I was extremely discouraged. I was swamped with depressing feelings. I felt like I did not belong here and that I had made a huge mistake coming here in the first place.
I applied for this job as a Teen Counselor, but instead the Director and HR Director felt I was capable of managing the front desk. When I got hired for this second job as a Front Desk Operator, I was skeptic of being able to keep this job. I wasn't sure I was qualified to be working this position. Everyday I dreaded getting sent in to have them tell me that they were letting me go. As time passed, I learned as I went and quickly got the hang of everything expected of me. There were many times where I had already gotten tasks done before my Director can tell me to do so.
As time went on, that place became my second home. I ate there, laughed there, played there, and worked there. Whenever I was at work, all my problems seemed to vanish. My staff became my family. Although there were many that left, I am glad to say that I was always on good terms with them. We were a team. We laughed and joked, but we also worked hard and supported one another. There has been many changes to this center staff-wise, changes to the interior decorating, different demographics of our members, and just the atmosphere of the facility in general as we transitioned to having a new Director. I am grateful to have experienced it all.
The members are the ones that tugs at my heart the most. I've seen so many of them grow up through the years. There were some that I wished I could've done more to help them with their difficult life and there were some that I'm proud to say that I've left an impact on. It wasn't easy always manning the desk and attempting to build relationships with these members that are usually involved in programs or activities. Nevertheless, I am so proud of them and feel like they are my own. I feel a strong protection over all of them. I was sobbing my heart out that day as their sad faces stared out at me when I announced that that was my last day. I attempted to deliver a coherent speech telling them that it has been an amazing journey being able to see them grow and for the to continue expanding their horizons, but I got drowned in my sorrow. That was the first and last time I've ever received so many hugs from so many members.
I guess it's so difficult for me because I've become so comfortable there. I know for a fact that I will never come across another occupation and feel the same genuine sense of being at home with family as I did there. This will be one experience I'll never forget.
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